Dusting Off the Cobwebs

Oh my....where to begin? Yes...it is me! I have not written on this blog in such a long time! I am a bit embarrassed too.
Mostly because it seems I just went "POOF" and disappeared. I think I hit several snags and felt like I didn't know what to talk about.

Part of the problem was that I had SO MUCH that I wanted to talk about but felt like I didn't know where to start or even if I really should. A lot was work related and I didn't want to cause myself any problems if you know what I mean. There were other factors like writer's block and health issues that still continue to plague me. I also didn't think people would relish reading about my health issues or work issues which were my main issues! Don't want to be a bore.

A lot of things have happened in my life since I last blogged.
My grandmother (Dad's mom) passed away and also my ex-boyfriend (I had written about him here and referred to him by his initial "M") also died after an unexpected cancer diagnosis. He died less than a month after his diagnosis and I found out about it when his cousin called me to tell me he was in the hospital and in a coma and not expected to live. Not too long before my last blog post, both my ex-husband (my daughter's dad) and my paternal grandfather died.

The most recent loss in my life happened this past July 3rd. My sweet dog Dexter was put to sleep. It was the most horrible decision I've had to make. He had been suffering in lots of pain for a year and it wasn't getting better. After many vet's visits and nothing was working I made the decision to end his suffering and let him go. I am still grieving him. I still cry over him. Honestly, I have cried more tears of anguish over him than I have some people that I have lost. People who were very dear and close to me whom I loved very deeply! Is that weird or unusual? If it is, I don't really care though. I had Dexter for thirteen years. He was such a good boy. I miss him so much. I was with him and holding him and kissing him when he passed away. I wanted him to know that I was there with him and loved him. Sometimes I'm tortured with guilt over it. The vet was so kind and sensitive and after he told me more about Dexter's condition with his spine and what to expect, I know I made the right decision. My heart just has not caught up with that fact yet. I have Dexter's ashes in a small porcelain urn inside a dark blue velvet heart-shaped box. It is sitting on the shelf above where I'm sitting now next to a sweet picture of him sitting on my late grandmother's lap. She loved him so much too.

In the days after Dexter died, I had been praying that he would come to me in a dream. I guess I thought if he came to me in a dream it would be a comfort to me. About three weeks after he died I did have a dream about him. In fact my ex-boyfriend who had died was in the dream too.
Dexter had always liked M very much. In my dream I was lounging on my parent's couch in their living room. I heard a familiar voice coming from behind me from the kitchen doorway. I was startled and looked up and standing right there beside me was M with a huge grin on his face and he was holding Dexter out toward me. He said, "Hey I have something for ya!" Dexter was wiggling around and he was so excited to see me. His tail was wagging so fast! M placed Dexter on my chest and I was so happy to see him and he was happy to see me! He was wiggling all around and he kept licking my nose and all over my face. I was petting his back and touching his head and then I woke up. The dream was so real that it seemed like I could still feel his wet kisses on my face and nose. I could still remember how it felt to once again pet him and love on him. I started to cry but I was also crying happy tears because I felt like he was letting me know that he loved me and he wasn't upset with me for letting him go. So now when I happen to dwell on those last sad moments I had with him as he quietly and peacefully passed away, I make myself remember that dream and it does give me some comfort.

My work situation is different now. Last February I started working day shift again. Long story short, a very "difficult" mean spirited person who was our supervisor for many years was first demoted and then fired. I am now working in the office where she used to work. We don't have a supervisor like before so the person who was over that supervisor is the one we report to. She is fantastic and the working atmosphere is so much better. Since going back to day shift after eight years on nights, I am now sleeping better too. That is a huge relief to me. The reason I went on night shift to begin with was to basically not be around the "difficult" person as much. She made life at work very nerve wracking. Everyone at work seems much more at ease now. It is like we can breathe now.

My daughter got married twenty-two months ago. Actually she and my son-in-law eloped. There was no big wedding with a beautiful white dress which bummed me out a bit. They went on a lovely honeymoon in Hawaii. They have done a lot of traveling since then too. They are out of the country right now and due to come back to the states on the 21st in time for Christmas.

Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

Where did my weekend go?

It's been a long while since I've blogged on here. Shame on me. I just can't seem to get my butt in gear lately. This weekend went by way too fast. I didn't do anything productive either. I was a hermit all weekend. Just watched some Netflix movies, watched some tv, a little internet surfing, a few odd jobs around the house and that's it. I had planned to visit my parents but ended up not even doing that. I hope my Mom isn't mad at me about that.



Tonight I was watching a Hallmark movie called Sweet Nothing in my Ear with Jeff Daniels and Marlee Matlin. About twenty five minutes before the ending of the movie, my daughter called me. We talked for about an hour. At the moment when she called me, a Hallmark commercial was on and I was all teary-eyed and sniffly from watching that! Those Hallmark commercials always affect me that way! Anyway, I was happy to talk to my daughter but I am so curious as to how the movie ended. I guess I could look up on the internet and find out what exactly happened.



This past Friday I had just laid down to go to bed at 4:30 in the morning. I was laying there with my dog beside when all of a sudden I felt my bed shaking. It felt like a big person was under my bed and pushing the bed up and down. I sat up and Dexter started barking like crazy. I was so stunned. My headboard was wobbling and I could hear a horrible noise rumbling. I got out of bed after it finally stopped shaking. It wasn't until then that I realized maybe...possibly it was an earthquake? I called my parents and asked them, "did you feel that?" Yes, they had too and we were all pretty excited. Dad wondered if the oil refinery in the next town had blown up. Mom wondered if it was a plane crash. I went outside with my cordless phone while still talking to Mom. I saw my neighbor across the street turning on his bedroom light and then he came outside on his porch and looked over at me. I hollered, "hey did you feel that too?" He said he felt it too. I was just relieved it wasn't all in my mind. It was all rather surreal.



I told Mom I would call her right back. I called the hospital and asked one of the e.r. nurses if they had felt a bad tremor and she said yes they felt it and she said her daughter had called from 4o miles away and said that the picture on her bedroom wall had fallen off and woke her up. I called Mom back and told her and by that time we both turned on the local tv news and they were already reporting it and said they were getting phone calls from all over about the earthquake. Later I felt another tremor at 10:15 am but it only lasted about three or four seconds long. My daughter said she felt the earthquake in Kentucky too.



On the work front...we won't be working with "Lydia" anymore. She quit.
So before too long we will have to start training another person.



Ordinary Life's Janet has given me a Gratitude With Attitude Award, bless her heart! I feel so unworthy because I haven't been blogging on a daily or even weekly basis. Thank you so much, Janet. I am going to pass this award on to Mrs. Who, Out of My Mind's cmk, and Deep in the Forrest's Aunt Jackie. I may not get over to read their blogs as often as I would like to but every time that I do, I am reminded of how grateful I am that I ever found them in the first place!

Scattergories

I saw this over at Janet's so I will give it a whirl too.
Copy and paste, substitute your name and first letter for the answers. See what you come up with!

What is your name……................Cindi
4 Letter word…………………………..Crap
Vehicle……………………………………Corvette
City…………………………………………Chicago
Boy Name……………………………….Caleb
Girl Name……………………………… Caitlin
Alcoholic Drink……………………… .Cognac
Occupation………………………………Cartographer
Something you wear…………………Coat
Celebrity…………………………………Christopher Walken
Food……………………………………….Chili
Something found in a bathroom…Cough syrup
Reason for being late……………….. carelessness
Cartoon Character…………………….Casper
Something you shout…………………Cut it out!
Animal…………………………………….Cougar
Body part…………………………………Coccyx
Word to describe you…………………Caring

********

I've got to get myself off this computer and go visit my parents now. I am ashamed of myself because I haven't been over there in three or four weeks. I even have to pass by their house on my way to work each day. Shame on me! I talk to Mom on the phone just about every day but that isn't the same as seeing Mom and Dad in person. So I better be a good daughter and get my butt over there. Dexter will be happy to go with me too because he loves to play with their three dogs.

Thanks, Janet!

Thank you Janet! Your tip on your last comment for explaining how to put spaces in between my paragraphs here did the trick! When I switched it to the html view it already had several "< div >"'s where I wanted my spaces so I just added the " < p > " like you said and voila! I wonder what the div stood for? Divide?

I went back to work last night after having four days off. Worked with Lydia. The night went by okay. Yeah, the body odor problem was still there but not as strong as other nights. Sometimes it is so bad that the smell stays attached to the upholstered chair she sits in and lingers in the work area for a long time. Even spraying the chair several times didn't get rid of the smell that last time when it was god-awful. Janet, I think you may be on to the reason in your last comment. It may be caused by what she is eating. I wondered if whacked out hormones were the culprit too.

Last night I had a sense that she may be aware of the problem because when I unexpectedly walked up to her as she sat in her cubicle, she looked surprised to see me walk up to her and she quickly pulled out on the front of her blouse as if to fan herself and made a puffing sound. I wish she would put a purse-size body spray in her purse so she could give herself a spritz every so often. There is no way to tell her that! Just a thought, maybe I could mention something about having some of that for myself when I feel like I don't feel so fresh? That might give her the idea to do the same.

A Wild Ride

I saw this on somebody's blog and don't remember who's blog it was. It was a blog I had never read before but I think I found them via Mrs. Who's blog. Watching this wild bike ride got my heart pumping! Enjoy!

Band Meme (HT to Hammer)

Hammer was tagged with this and invited others to do it too. So here is mine. It was fun! Here were his instructions.

Here's how it goes. You are about to have your own band's CD cover. Follow these directions Go to......
1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:RandomThe first article title on the page is the name of your band.
2. http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3The last four words of the very last quote is the title of your album.
3. http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.
4. Use your graphics program of choice to throw them together.

Like Hammer, I will tag whoever would like to do it. Let me know in the comments if you did it so I can check yours out!

Electoral Compass

A friend sent me the link to this Electoral Compass website. It asks you a series of questions and you answer how you stand on that issue. At the end of the quiz it gives you the candidates that you most closely align with. I found it very interesting. You can also click on each of the candidates and find out where they stand on the issues at hand. Try it out!

Book Game (HT to cmk)

Okay, cmk has a book game on her blog and has asked others to join in so I will give it a whirl.

Here are the rules to the Book Game:

1. Grab the nearest book
2. Open the book to page 123
3. Find the fifth sentence
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences (#5,6,7) on your blog, along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it. Just grab what is closest!

If you decide to play, copy and paste the rules into your blog. Then, follow the rules and put your book passage following. Easy and fun!

I did end up skipping P.E. & lunch today. Was that
wrong? Is skipping unimportant classes wrong?

This came from a book I received for Christmas. I haven't read it yet. It is called Miss American Pie: A Diary of Love, Secrets, and Growing Up in the 1970's. The author is Margaret Sartor. It received a lot of good reviews and won the Chicago Tribune's Best Book of the Year for 2006.
Since I have written in diaries most of my life, I thought it would be an interesting book. I had it on my Amazon Wish list so my Mom gave it to me. I received six new books for Christmas. I am still not finished reading some books I bought before Christmas so I have my reading all planned out for me for a while.


If anyone else decides to do this, let me know in the comments!